Water over head or under bridge?

                      OK I know these can't seem profound real post coming so quickly. This is the world in my head and how quickly it works.
                      Water it has properties to heal, comfort, soothe and to create havoc. Right now I am trying to decide if it is working for me or against me. Have the waters been parted by my Lord to make a way or are the waves over my head. I cant seem to keep bills paid and my life in any normal shape. Its pay the car insurance or cell phone. Pay the sitter or buy gas? Its as if someone through me out into the deep end of the ocean and with each day they are throwing me a sand bag to hold onto. I know with Faith God always makes a way. Then why are we left blind to see no way out. With piling debt and stress over how we are going to make it through the day, I don't know how to deal.
                         Its funny how judged you are as a single mom. My parents constantly judge my money use, my parenting skills and every move I make. Knowing I will be the soul party responsible once again is kinda frightening but I have to make this happen. I have to be on my own once again. I can no longer continue trying to please everyone else so that they don't view me as weak or incompetent. No matter how much I do or try there is a stigma attached to 30 year old living with their parents no matter what the situation is. I was living on my own then I was laid off. I couldn't find a job for 6 months and I have been behind on bills. My credit is shot from 2 divorces and 3 layoffs. So in a society that says you are to have the house, cars, kids, animals and be home to enjoy it all I say NO THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE!!! We have to work to earn money and that is just to get by. To miss out on things for our kids because we come from a broken society, with broken people and broken homes. Women can no longer sit and hold their babies they have to hand them over to strangers to raise while verily making enough money to pay those sitters. We are a society of Women who are exhausted, beaten, weary and lonely. Even with great friends and churches and support groups we were not designed to be leaders of our families. We were not designed to burden all that we deal with daily. We were made to stand with our partners together bearing our burdens.
                             So is this ordained by God is he making the way and placing a bridge for us to cross this rushing river of madness or are we being swept away by the current?
                         

American Momma