Anger

Today I have had a lot of down time and I'm angry!! I'm angry I let him back in. I'm angry he wiggled and lied his way back into my heart. I'm angry God didn't stop me! I'm angry he doesn't love me! I'm angry because he doesn't love me! Did you hear that I'm angry that I still love him! Woman made because man was not to be alone, yet he prefers to be alone. I want to scream as loud as I can for God to hear me. My heart hurts fix it! It's been 6 years of hard work and still no love. I gave him everything and do I get any appreciation, none. I get no respect no love. I have so many questions I can't keep up. I just want to be free. If he won't love me, I don't want to feel any love for him. This man who puts so much time into conning everyone so he becomes what he thinks they want him to be can't even be himself. I know hisself and I still love him. What is wrong with me? I have to give up. I have to quit. He will never love me, I'm just not it. I have to move forward! Even though I'll never get the truth because I'm not even sure he knows the truth anymore, I would still like the courtesy of truth. I have been so damaged by him he can't do anymore harm. I'm angry he hurt me! I'm angry he lied! I'm angry he used me. I'm angry he doesn't love me! I'm angry I love him!!! I hate this feeling!! I'm angry you don't love me! Do you hear me? I am a person and deserve better than this! I am worthy! I am worthy!! I am a child of God Almighty you won't get to far with this! He will make you repent! Whether it's here on earth or in the pit for the rest of time, you will repent! I know this sounds harsh but I'm hurt you torched my heart! I believe in the Almighty and he promises me, to drive out my enemy's! You have been against me for so long I'm not sure you could feel this wrong. You may think its just another day, but you were wrong! This is yours yet I still own it! I'm angry I can't let it go! I'm angry I haven't let you go. So silence you get. 7 days of it! No text no email, no access to me. I'm done your free. Hope in that 7 days I have cleared my head and no longer feel the need to contact you. It's Wednesday at 2:30 pm so untill next wednesday you get no more out of me. My energy and time is being wasted on someone that doesn't deserve it! American momma.